Sir, please supply two of the gutta-percha flapdoodles as illustrated. I enclose a Postal Order made up with the stamps of Her Majesty to the value of 4/-
Sir, I note that Christmas preparations start earlier every year. I have already hired extra staff for Yule. With servant quarters most full, I barrack the new staff unto the stables, which I fear may be not to their liking. But their shouts of joy, hear
Darling Emma, I am surging along with your life blood, coursing through the secret places of your body. I wish to escape from you but I am harried from place to place in my thots. I cannot escape from the rhythmic spurt of your love juice.
Sir, I have often contemplated that the fairer sex of foreign lands do so often dress in a mysterious and attractive way that is so rarely seen at home.
Sir, Lady B___ is most pleased with our new maid, who cleans diligently and does not steal nor shirk. I too am most pleased with our new hire. On receipt of an extra shilling, she do work sans vêtements on Fridays whilst Lady B___ is away.
Sirs, With great anxiety I must request that you rush me an appropriate quantity of the Date Mate 1900 Pheromonotic liquid. Please understand that I request this product for scientific reasons alone. I enclose 10d postal order plus carriage.
Sir, Today I receive a postcard from Gussy Herbert, who is currently in Egypt searching for lost treasures of the pharaohs. "I have uncovered some amazing finds", he writes, "You would not believe how many whores you can hire for a shilling". I raise
Sir, Gussy Herbert do send me details of a secret Ladies-only club somewhere in Pall Mall. I find this shocking to deny the attendance of Men, especially as the activities therein do appear most fascinating.
Sir, The groundskeeper do ask for an assistant with some minor maintenance. I am loathe to hire extra staff,and so I send maid Gertie along. It is the 18__'s and I respect modern equality. With my training rule "make a mistake,clothing off you take",
Sir, With much correspondence, I have hired myself a typewriting maid. It may be imagined that I permit her to work in this manner to prevent ink spoiling her clothing. Not so. I offered her an extra penny an hour if she might type out my letters whilst
