Sirs, With great anxiety I must request that you rush me an appropriate quantity of the Date Mate 1900 Pheromonotic liquid. Please understand that I request this product for scientific reasons alone. I enclose 10d postal order plus carriage.
Sir, a maid had to leave my employ most suddenly, and so I was seeking a speedy replacement. I requested some particulars from the agency, and one candidate had enclosed a photolithograph. Do you know, I think she will be just perfect for the position.
Sir, The groundskeeper do ask for an assistant with some minor maintenance. I am loathe to hire extra staff,and so I send maid Gertie along. It is the 18__'s and I respect modern equality. With my training rule "make a mistake,clothing off you take",
Sir, I have been hoodwinked! My previous posting of All Hallow's activities, and indeed this one, are both forgeries! Please consult the detailed article that I have noted within the replies to this posting.
Sir, Maid Mary asks what it do be like to live a life of finery and extravagance. Now, it may be the 4 brandies expressing eloquence, but I do invite Mary upstairs to sample the life of her betters. She leaves her old life, and on my instruction, her clo
Sir, Today I receive a postcard from Gussy Herbert, who is currently in Egypt searching for lost treasures of the pharaohs. "I have uncovered some amazing finds", he writes, "You would not believe how many whores you can hire for a shilling". I raise
Sir, to-day I do receive a flyer advertising a special show at the Parisian Club performed by Pierre Acrobatique and his assistants. I cancel tonight's theatre with Lady B___ and hasten to the club. I have always been something of a ballet aficionado.
Sir, an enquiry. Some few weeks past, I did place an order for medicinal herbs from the Empire by packet post. Having waited the allotted "28 weeks for delivery", all I have received is this postcard which assures that delivery is imminent. Have I lost
Sir, Tho' most unseemly to give gifts to lower orders, I have this fine print for maid Mary. She has been a most attentive maid, and pray she appreciates the story that plays out upon it. That of a master rogering the girl who brings him his dinner. I d
Sir, please supply two of the gutta-percha flapdoodles as illustrated. I enclose a Postal Order made up with the stamps of Her Majesty to the value of 4/-
Sir, Lady B___ is most pleased with our new maid, who cleans diligently and does not steal nor shirk. I too am most pleased with our new hire. On receipt of an extra shilling, she do work sans vêtements on Fridays whilst Lady B___ is away.
Sir, I have often contemplated that the fairer sex of foreign lands do so often dress in a mysterious and attractive way that is so rarely seen at home.
Sir, In Another Place, a question was raised as to where one might see erotic depictions from the 1600's. I have spent a pleasant evening's research in my library, and can provide this pleasant painting from 1590 of a lady who has much to show us.
Sir, In this modern age I feel we have lost sight of the origins of All Hallows Eve, to whit : devil worship and punishing naked servants. Fortunately, I run a very traditional estate where traditional rituals are strictly observed.