Sir, I out to the furniture emporium, to purchase a chaise longue for Lady B___. Upon its delivery, I am most anxious as to it's comfort. I enlist Maid Ellie to advise me as to it's skin feel. "How do you mean, sir?" she enquires.
Darling Emma, I am surging along with your life blood, coursing through the secret places of your body. I wish to escape from you but I am harried from place to place in my thots. I cannot escape from the rhythmic spurt of your love juice.
Sir, Lord Shaftesbury do visit, and is taken aback when served by my new maid from the colonies. He says some unpleasantness, believing her to be in some way inferior, which I am quick to dispute. I arrange a compatison with another maid, and Lord S soon
Sir, With the ever-present threat of withdrawn labour, I seek to improve the welfare of my staff somewhat. Some old tapestries, a few chairs, and the below-stairs quarters have much comfort. Maid Elly is most delighted, and asks if there is some way that
Sir, an enquiry. Some few weeks past, I did place an order for medicinal herbs from the Empire by packet post. Having waited the allotted "28 weeks for delivery", all I have received is this postcard which assures that delivery is imminent. Have I lost
Sir, Tho' most unseemly to give gifts to lower orders, I have this fine print for maid Mary. She has been a most attentive maid, and pray she appreciates the story that plays out upon it. That of a master rogering the girl who brings him his dinner. I d
Sir, my dearest wife has taken to spanking the maids with a paddle, in my heart I feel a sorrow for the maids as my dearest wife leaves the reddest of imprints and uses paddles of the hardest timber
Sir, A communique from my friend 'Gussy' Herbert, presently embracing the cultural delights of Paris. He is saving money by sharing his Dollymop with two other clients. Gussy (reclining) appears most overwhelmed by the experience.
Sir, please supply two of the gutta-percha flapdoodles as illustrated. I enclose a Postal Order made up with the stamps of Her Majesty to the value of 4/-
Sir, This yule I did hold a great dinner with many guests. "The Amazing Madame Balencio" from Spain did entertain us. Lady B___ was not much favoured to this act, but I was so impressed that I invited Madame Balencio back to my chamber for a further de
Sir, Gussy Herbert do send me details of a secret Ladies-only club somewhere in Pall Mall. I find this shocking to deny the attendance of Men, especially as the activities therein do appear most fascinating.
Sir, The groundskeeper do ask for an assistant with some minor maintenance. I am loathe to hire extra staff,and so I send maid Gertie along. It is the 18__'s and I respect modern equality. With my training rule "make a mistake,clothing off you take",