Sir, a maid had to leave my employ most suddenly, and so I was seeking a speedy replacement. I requested some particulars from the agency, and one candidate had enclosed a photolithograph. Do you know, I think she will be just perfect for the position.
My new maid from overseas brings with her an unusual custom, and one that I am intrigued to introduce to my other staff. It is a most hygenic practice.
Sir, I out to the furniture emporium, to purchase a chaise longue for Lady B___. Upon its delivery, I am most anxious as to it's comfort. I enlist Maid Ellie to advise me as to it's skin feel. "How do you mean, sir?" she enquires.
Sirs, With great anxiety I must request that you rush me an appropriate quantity of the Date Mate 1900 Pheromonotic liquid. Please understand that I request this product for scientific reasons alone. I enclose 10d postal order plus carriage.
Sir, Lady B___ complains at length that her looking-glass be all distorted. I at once do attend to the problem. With Maid Hettie assisting, I spend 2 hours, perhaps more, diligently studying the mirror glass from all angles, but have to declare that it i
Sir, Gussy Herbert do send me details of a secret Ladies-only club somewhere in Pall Mall. I find this shocking to deny the attendance of Men, especially as the activities therein do appear most fascinating.
Sir, Ensure all staff know safe use of ladders! One of my maids fell from a height when an improperly latched stepladder collapsed under her. With a broken arm she was unable to resume cleaning duties and following her dismissal, it took me some consider
Sir, A communique from my friend 'Gussy' Herbert, presently embracing the cultural delights of Paris. He is saving money by sharing his Dollymop with two other clients. Gussy (reclining) appears most overwhelmed by the experience.
Sir, Maid Eleanor did recently avert embarrassment when Lady B__ found her naked with me. Eleanor explained her clothes were in the wash & she had no other to wear. As reward for quick thinking, I exchanged Eleanor's straw sack with a proper bed. El
Sir, Maid Mary asks what it do be like to live a life of finery and extravagance. Now, it may be the 4 brandies expressing eloquence, but I do invite Mary upstairs to sample the life of her betters. She leaves her old life, and on my instruction, her clo
Sir, A tiring day admonishing servants for their wanton idleness. I retire to my library with a brandy. Lady B___ dislikes old books, which she insists serve no purpose except the gathering of dust. Yet there is so much to learn from studying the old tex
Sir, It is no secret within our club that I do not regard Gussy Herbert of possessing great intelligence or education. However, it must be noted that the medical staff of Saint Thomas' Hospital do learn much from him whenever he returns from overseas wi
Sir, Having caught that blaggard Greengrocer in flagrante delicto with a maid after dark, I have instigated a strict ban on visitors after 4pm. I anticipated much complaint and protestation from the staff, but there was none. Perhaps they have found othe
