Upon presenting myself to the sun room for a fine breakfast, I discovered not one rasher of bacon upon the platter. It seems the cook's uniforms had not been returned from the laundry, and she did not wish to damage herself while cooking. She was able,
Sir, Having caught that blaggard Greengrocer in flagrante delicto with a maid after dark, I have instigated a strict ban on visitors after 4pm. I anticipated much complaint and protestation from the staff, but there was none. Perhaps they have found othe
Sir, It is said that at this cold time of year when provisions are low, that altruism is a saintly virtue to be rewarded in heaven. However, I offered maid Susan sixpence and a half sack of coal, and I was greatly rewarded that very evening.
Sir, A communique from my friend 'Gussy' Herbert, presently embracing the cultural delights of Paris. He is saving money by sharing his Dollymop with two other clients. Gussy (reclining) appears most overwhelmed by the experience.
Darling Emma, I am surging along with your life blood, coursing through the secret places of your body. I wish to escape from you but I am harried from place to place in my thots. I cannot escape from the rhythmic spurt of your love juice.
Sir, With the ever-present threat of withdrawn labour, I seek to improve the welfare of my staff somewhat. Some old tapestries, a few chairs, and the below-stairs quarters have much comfort. Maid Elly is most delighted, and asks if there is some way that
Sir, Tho' most unseemly to give gifts to lower orders, I have this fine print for maid Mary. She has been a most attentive maid, and pray she appreciates the story that plays out upon it. That of a master rogering the girl who brings him his dinner. I d
Sir, please supply two of the gutta-percha flapdoodles as illustrated. I enclose a Postal Order made up with the stamps of Her Majesty to the value of 4/-
Sir, All Hallow's Eve is a traditional time for the servants to clean the chimneys. The imps and sprites are most active at this time and they do assist. I think it is nonsense of course, but I would not want to break a long-held belief among staff. I s
Sir, I have often contemplated that the fairer sex of foreign lands do so often dress in a mysterious and attractive way that is so rarely seen at home.
