Sirs, With great anxiety I must request that you rush me an appropriate quantity of the Date Mate 1900 Pheromonotic liquid. Please understand that I request this product for scientific reasons alone. I enclose 10d postal order plus carriage.
Sir, A communique from my friend 'Gussy' Herbert, presently embracing the cultural delights of Paris. He is saving money by sharing his Dollymop with two other clients. Gussy (reclining) appears most overwhelmed by the experience.
Sir, With the ever-present threat of withdrawn labour, I seek to improve the welfare of my staff somewhat. Some old tapestries, a few chairs, and the below-stairs quarters have much comfort. Maid Elly is most delighted, and asks if there is some way that
Sir, an enquiry. Some few weeks past, I did place an order for medicinal herbs from the Empire by packet post. Having waited the allotted "28 weeks for delivery", all I have received is this postcard which assures that delivery is imminent. Have I lost
My new maid from overseas brings with her an unusual custom, and one that I am intrigued to introduce to my other staff. It is a most hygenic practice.
Sir, I out to the furniture emporium, to purchase a chaise longue for Lady B___. Upon its delivery, I am most anxious as to it's comfort. I enlist Maid Ellie to advise me as to it's skin feel. "How do you mean, sir?" she enquires.
Sir, Maid Eleanor did recently avert embarrassment when Lady B__ found her naked with me. Eleanor explained her clothes were in the wash & she had no other to wear. As reward for quick thinking, I exchanged Eleanor's straw sack with a proper bed. El
Sir, my dearest wife has taken to spanking the maids with a paddle, in my heart I feel a sorrow for the maids as my dearest wife leaves the reddest of imprints and uses paddles of the hardest timber
Sir, Lady B___ is most pleased with our new maid, who cleans diligently and does not steal nor shirk. I too am most pleased with our new hire. On receipt of an extra shilling, she do work sans vêtements on Fridays whilst Lady B___ is away.
Darling Emma, I am surging along with your life blood, coursing through the secret places of your body. I wish to escape from you but I am harried from place to place in my thots. I cannot escape from the rhythmic spurt of your love juice.
Sir, In Another Place, a question was raised as to where one might see erotic depictions from the 1600's. I have spent a pleasant evening's research in my library, and can provide this pleasant painting from 1590 of a lady who has much to show us.
Sir, Maid Dottie do sometimes play upon an evening, but there is much displeasure from my guests as to her skill. After some discussion with my maid, we reach a solution that is most amenable to all. Some of my guests cannot now cease watching Dottie pla
Sir, please supply two of the gutta-percha flapdoodles as illustrated. I enclose a Postal Order made up with the stamps of Her Majesty to the value of 4/-
Sir, In this modern age I feel we have lost sight of the origins of All Hallows Eve, to whit : devil worship and punishing naked servants. Fortunately, I run a very traditional estate where traditional rituals are strictly observed.