Sirs and Madames, May I thank you most wholeheartedly for your continuing vigilance in reporting the unwanted promotional material that urchins have been leaving here of late. The lazy maids responsible have been punished.
Sir, Maid Edith has only a hard wooden chair at home. I catch her admiring my soft luxurious furniture. "It do look such comfort to sit upon" she sighs. I offer to show how there is an even better way to enjoy it's softness and luxury against the skin
Sir, My philanthropy is widely known, but today I felt I could go further. With immediate effect I have instigated a penny increase in all female staff wages. Staff merely have to work naked to receive this bonus. (Subject to Lady B___'s absence)
Sirs and Madames, I most cordially welcome our new members who have arrived at the door of our club. All are welcome and I trust you will have an enjoyable stay here. I have instructed the maid to put extra coal on the fire for your comfort.
Sir, Today I had much business work, with many gentlemen to see and little of it to my benefit. This evening I do retire early to my library, where maid Mary brings me Port and I do at last relax with my old books which contain many illustrations that ar
Unfortunately, Lady B___ did not believe my explanation that the artist girl from the village merely wished to avoid soiling her delicate clothes with paint.
Will patrons of our fine club be on the lookout for the whereabouts of this blaggard. He calls himself a gentleman, but he is a mere greengrocer and he has been seducing my staff. A role that I should have exclusive rights to.
Sir, I recently sent a postal order for 3 guineas to an advertisement in the "personals" section of a gentleman's periodical. "Receive by return post,a photolithograph of a mistress most strict". I may have been hoodwinked.
Sir, I out to the furniture emporium, to purchase a chaise longue for Lady B___. Upon its delivery, I am most anxious as to it's comfort. I enlist Maid Ellie to advise me as to it's skin feel. "How do you mean, sir?" she enquires.
Sir, it most pleases me to share a photolithograph of my maid Rosie. She is most enthusiastic upon the gentlefolk inspecting her particulars. Daily, she is up at 4:30am to light my fire, I can postulate.
Sir, Lady B___, suspicious of noises within the servants rooms late at night, do decree no visitors past 7pm. I do worry that the maids will miss the attention and comfort from ~~myself~~ unknown suitors, but upon checking their welfare, I discover the m
