Maid Elsie tells me she wears a hat that she is unable to remove. "Can your other clothes be removed?" I ask. "Why yes sir", and she demonstrates. "But not your hat?" "No, sir." I suspect she has been at the Laudanum again.
Sir, I recently sent a postal order for 3 guineas to an advertisement in the "personals" section of a gentleman's periodical. "Receive by return post,a photolithograph of a mistress most strict". I may have been hoodwinked.
Sir, Following an unfortunate encounter with spring and horsehair, Lady B___ instructs me to purchase a new chaise longue with immediate effect. I do take maid Ida to the showroom to assist. "It must not interfere with dress nor skin" I explain. Ida as
Sir, Today I had much business work, with many gentlemen to see and little of it to my benefit. This evening I do retire early to my library, where maid Mary brings me Port and I do at last relax with my old books which contain many illustrations that ar
Sir, Lady B___ do insist on new drapes be fitted in her chamber, to prevent spying eyes from seeing her in a state of undress. I enlist maid Lina to help prove that no part of a naked body is visible through the drapes. This scientific experimentation do
Sir, a maid had to leave my employ most suddenly, and so I was seeking a speedy replacement. I requested some particulars from the agency, and one candidate had enclosed a photolithograph. Do you know, I think she will be just perfect for the position.
My appointment as Foreign Office Deputy Secretary had hardly been published in the Gazette when I received an offer by this charming lady to take a position in my household. I must say, her references are as scant as her apparel, however I believe I shal
Sir, it most pleases me to share a photolithograph of my maid Rosie. She is most enthusiastic upon the gentlefolk inspecting her particulars. Daily, she is up at 4:30am to light my fire, I can postulate.
Sir, Upon recommendation from Lord Southborough, I did employ the local wise woman to bring good fortune upon my estate. Visiting upon the evening of Beltane, she did perform a mysterious incantation. It is bunkum and hocus-pocus of course, but I did fin
Sir, A comely lady of many merits did supply to me by post a photolithograph that I at once believed to have been optically modified with a bubble-nancy lens, as is the fashion of to-day. However, upon meeting said lady, I did discover to my great enjoym
Unfortunately, Lady B___ did not believe my explanation that the artist girl from the village merely wished to avoid soiling her delicate clothes with paint.
Sir, following a rewarding meeting with a comely lady,I receive an invitation to send a postal order for 20 shillings to personally receive photolithographs of an intimate nature. I tell Lady B___ that I am off for a stroll to the village. They have fine
Will patrons of our fine club be on the lookout for the whereabouts of this blaggard. He calls himself a gentleman, but he is a mere greengrocer and he has been seducing my staff. A role that I should have exclusive rights to.
Sir, Lady B___, suspicious of noises within the servants rooms late at night, do decree no visitors past 7pm. I do worry that the maids will miss the attention and comfort from ~~myself~~ unknown suitors, but upon checking their welfare, I discover the m
Sirs and Madames, May I thank you most wholeheartedly for your continuing vigilance in reporting the unwanted promotional material that urchins have been leaving here of late. The lazy maids responsible have been punished.
