Sir, I recently sent a postal order for 3 guineas to an advertisement in the "personals" section of a gentleman's periodical. "Receive by return post,a photolithograph of a mistress most strict". I may have been hoodwinked.
Sir, A comely lady of many merits did supply to me by post a photolithograph that I at once believed to have been optically modified with a bubble-nancy lens, as is the fashion of to-day. However, upon meeting said lady, I did discover to my great enjoym
Sir, Lady B___, suspicious of noises within the servants rooms late at night, do decree no visitors past 7pm. I do worry that the maids will miss the attention and comfort from ~~myself~~ unknown suitors, but upon checking their welfare, I discover the m
Sir, I out to the furniture emporium, to purchase a chaise longue for Lady B___. Upon its delivery, I am most anxious as to it's comfort. I enlist Maid Ellie to advise me as to it's skin feel. "How do you mean, sir?" she enquires.
Sir, Upon the morning's post I do receive a card from Herbert Gussy, who is currently visiting Bavaria. It appears a most welcoming country. I feel the urge to travel once more.
Sir, A new system for "peer assessment" of staff comes to my attention. I am all for modern progress, but I do sometimes prefer the old ways. Or at least permit me to watch the proceedings.
Sir, Following an unfortunate encounter with spring and horsehair, Lady B___ instructs me to purchase a new chaise longue with immediate effect. I do take maid Ida to the showroom to assist. "It must not interfere with dress nor skin" I explain. Ida as
Sir, a maid had to leave my employ most suddenly, and so I was seeking a speedy replacement. I requested some particulars from the agency, and one candidate had enclosed a photolithograph. Do you know, I think she will be just perfect for the position.
Sirs and Madames, May I thank you most wholeheartedly for your continuing vigilance in reporting the unwanted promotional material that urchins have been leaving here of late. The lazy maids responsible have been punished.
Sir, Maid Edith has only a hard wooden chair at home. I catch her admiring my soft luxurious furniture. "It do look such comfort to sit upon" she sighs. I offer to show how there is an even better way to enjoy it's softness and luxury against the skin
Sir, Upon employing two new maids, I was pleasantly surprised to note how they worked most harmoniously together. Further, my insistence that maids share accommodation to reduce costs is usually met with much disagreement, but my new staff were most deli
Sir, It is often said that women do not like the hobby of bicycling. I wholeheartedly disagree with this false statement. Here we can clearly see one who is getting much pleasure from her velocipede.
Maid Elsie tells me she wears a hat that she is unable to remove. "Can your other clothes be removed?" I ask. "Why yes sir", and she demonstrates. "But not your hat?" "No, sir." I suspect she has been at the Laudanum again.
Sir, Upon reading of the modern "Sapphic Love" in a book within my library, I had some maids attempt the embrace as described. I have to say that I concur with Her Majesty Queen Victoria - I cannot imagine this arrangement being very pleasurable. Altho
