You don't want a "Home Alone" situation! So you make sure lights and gas are turned off. The faggot is plugged and locked. Now you can leave the house, with no worries. 😉
Condom Fairy—me, 10yrs ago, handing out free condoms to every man I saw at my first-weekend-of-college festival. Would *you* have used a condom on the Condom F*ggot, Sir?
